You were probably an accident (not really, though)

I estimate that (VERY, VERY conservatively) 75% of people in the world were unintended/an accident. I actually think the statistic is more like 100%, but sometimes that seems crazy and so I softened it by randomly choosing a more reasonable figure. But seriously, even if two people are married and willing to have a kid (which, let’s be honest, that can’t be more than 50% of parents, amiright? I mean, affairs and love children and all that) they don’t know which, um, attempt at parenthood, will, like, succeed. So they can’t’ve specifically meant that kid. The best they can do is ballpark it. Even parents don’t necessarily know the conditions of a child’s conception. And if they do, they still don’t know what that kid will be like; their interests, their hair, their face.

It really blew me away to think about how if you just go into a place with people and look at them, 100% are the personification of a sexual encounter (do not bring up test tube babies plz kthx) and conservatively 75% of them are the personification of some sort of mistake. Humans are good at making mistakes. A Wendell Berry poem someone read to me tonight said something like, "thank God for ignorance, for humans cannot destroy what they don't know about."

However, God knew and intended each one of us specifically. Every freckle. He created us in His image because it was His good pleasure, and He wanted us to know Him and love Him the way He knows us and loves us. All the planning that went into creating you is… lots of generations. Here are some fave lyrics from Sleeping at Last, a band I just really kind of love:

You were a million years of work
said God and his angels with needle and thread
they kissed your head
and said
“you’re a good kid
and you make us proud
so just give your best and the rest will come and we’ll see you soon”

How amazing that I was planned from the beginning. I exist. I didn’t have to be, but I am because God wanted me to be. Lastly, this is paraphrased from a Facebook group I was once a part of, when Facebook, like, had groups (I don’t really know what’s going on with that now): “If you ever feel down, sad, alone, or weak, like you have never done anything significant, just remember that you were once the fastest and most victorious of all the millions of little sperm.”